The Man’s dojo

The Man’s dojo

Since time memorial, those who practice martial art would retreat and go into deep meditation. This they would do in a space of uttermost silence, far away from the daily disruptions. When they emerged, they were more relaxed, rejuvenated, re-energized and recharged, ready for the next challenge. This place, they referred to as “The dojo”.

When I think of the dojo, I can’t help but to reflect on the words of this classic song by Chicago “Everybody needs a little time away I heard her say From each other” True from these words, everybody needs their “Me” time! The only difference is, the man’s me time is unique. The man’s “Me” time is, “The Dojo”! You see, the man’s dojo is a bit complex, takes different shapes and has been often misunderstood by humans of the female gender. Sisters, when you ask him the question “What are you thinking?”  and he responds with “nothing”, the brother is in his dojo! When you find him holding the TV remote and you ask him a question and he can’t “hear” you, the brother is in his dojo! It could be a Newspaper that he is reading, a game of chess that he is playing, a soccer game he is watching, a car he has taken for a wash or just silently staring at “nothing”. That’s his space, that’s his dojo!

In his dojo the man finds inner peace, finds comfort, his soul is rejuvenated, he rekindles love, he rises again. The “dojo effect” as I call it, can only be likened to what the eagle goes through to be rekindled and experience a fresh breath of life. The only difference being that the man needs his dojo (Whatever form it takes) one too many times.

The challenge that the man faces is that his dojo has been interfered with, and continues to be interfered with by the sisters, not once, not twice, not thrice……….” I feel ignored”, “You don’t like spending time with me”, “Will you please get me a...” “Please take me to the….” These they say without any regard to the “code of silence” in the dojo! “Why are you being anti-social?” they ask. “Hello! I can’t hear you” & “will you please get out of my dojo” are the silent responses that comes from the look the man gives.

Brothers have a code of understanding on when a brother is in his dojo and can read the invisible “do not interfere” sign. It is therefore not a surprise to walk into deafening silence in a room full of men. Brothers don’t interpret this as “weird” but view this as a “step closer to rejuvenation”

The dojo is precious, is sacred, is refreshing, is revitalizing and it gives a rebirth to the man and as such, the dojo must be respected, must be esteemed highly! The man’s dojo is a no-go-zone for the sisters. If only the sisters would understand this, then they would be the greatest beneficiaries of a rejuvenated, re-energized, rekindled and a recharged man! But again, do they/ Will they ever understand?  As John Gray says….” Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus”.

Let me retreat to my dojo!

Jamo