Smooth Operator- Like a a rushing wind,he walks in and out of your life,never to be seen

I grew up in a staunch Christian family and one of the activities that I got involved in to build my faith was participating in Christian youth camps. Of course, as a teenager, I just didn’t look forward to the camps for spiritual nourishment but also for the socialization sake of it. In those days they referred to me as “God’s gift to the ladies” coz I was young, in a singing group and was playing the guitar! I was macho, with some six-pack to show off. Well, not anymore. I have since aged and worked hard at rebranding and shedding off that tag line. In one of those camps, I met this girl, let’s call her “Peggy”, well, let’s just say she was pretty and I spotted her. Being the gift as they would call me, Peggy was more than happy to be spotted and charmed by me and gladly continued communication after the camp. Fast forward 3 months later, Peggy was out of my life and I couldn’t even remember what she looked like or who her real name was. That was me back then, the charmer, the heart breaker through disappearance.

Once, twice, thrice, in a lifetime you find that person who comes into your life and wordsmiths you out of reality and into a seemingly unending fantasy. This is the smooth operator; He is verbally skilled, persuasive, an astute negotiator, a con artist, very manipulative! I know as I shared the story of Peggy, the lady readers are either smiling, fuming or having mixed emotions or starting to process a name or names of some clever scoundrel who either is in their life or has been there before and swept them off their feet and they feel like they are over the moon! This is fantasy ladies, pure fantasy, run away and run away fast. Don’t be caught up in this snare that will leave you empty, heartbroken and bitter.

To the married folk, be on the look-out for this fox that comes to devour relationships in the name of, “He is understanding, he is a good listener, he is caring, he doesn’t judge me, he is a gentleman, he is supportive, he has good advice………what the hell…. This one will steal, kill and destroy and leave you hanging trying to pick up the pieces of what was once a happy family. Run away, don’t let him start the talk, shut him out completely give him no room. He thrives on broken dreams that have been shattered with age and shows up as the dreams fixer! Robert Greene in his book the art of seduction describes him as the ideal lover and assumes the symbol of a portrait painter. “Under his eye, all of your physical imperfections disappear. He brings out noble qualities in you, frames you a myth, makes you godlike, immortalizes you. For his ability to create such fantasies, he is rewarded with great power”

To the unmarried, the smooth operator will not just show up as the Mr. Charmer but will also portray some narcistic ways from a distance, he will often appear as being two-faced, putting friends and family down behind their backs, he has these tendencies of blaming his failures on others and puts on a different face in public from what you know him. He is addicted to fantasies, he will lie and pull that “wasn’t me” Shaggy line on you, he is a flirt and often unreliable but usually, his charm on you is irresistible! The signs are so clear, run away and do so fast!

To the man out there, married and unmarried, true love is in masculinity. Genuinely love her, care for her and when you speak with her and to her, say what you mean and mean what you say! Charm is sweet and makes you feel macho, a conqueror, a mighty warrior but it also breaks hearts, brings hate and bitterness and messes with destinies. The role of the man is to be a role model and leader to your family. Be the man that society expects you to be, be the man that your woman expects you to be, be the man that your boy children want to be like, be the man that your daughter dreams of marrying. Be the light to show them the way and be the salt to season their lives! Don’t be the smooth operator.

Jamo